Friday, December 11, 2009

Howdy howdy howdy

Time: 0148

Location: Unknown

Mood: Interesting

Activity: Docile

Energy level: Blue

So you know sometimes when you're up for a while and then you think you're going to get a good rest, but your body just decides to mess with you and then you're up for a while more and then your body clock is all confused-like and you need to stay up a little later to get back on some semblance of a schedule and so your mind gets confused and jumbled like a football being dribbled down a street? Hi - that's me.

Don't really have a good sleep schedule - stayed up all night for some duty - had to roll right into work and then at the end of that day I thought - hey, I'm all caught up, how about I get to bed early...sweet. Bed by 9:30pm asleep by 9:30pm awake at...2:30 in the am??? What? No way - this can't be - I'm tired - I want to sleep - noooooo - but yes. I'm awake - I'm not sleepy - whatever gland / fuse in my body that regulates sleep / fatigue must have taken a vacation without letting me know - somebody forgot to tell him that we're on deployment here - or maybe he's actually just working double time because after 5 hours of sleep after being up for a couple of days I feel...fine - I try to go back to sleep - do whatever I can - but ever since getting married - if we're not together, I can't get to sleep unless I'm totally exhausted. If not - I usually find something else to do with my time - why waste it on sleep if she's not there? So that's how my day started - 4 meals, a bunch of vitamins, a workout, a couple hundred miles covered in the air, 2 cups of coffee during the day (thanks for the instant Starbucks, by the way - that stuff is actually pretty awesome), a bunch of work-stuff, and a much needed shower later - here I am - sometime after the flight my body threw in the towel and was telling me "Hey...HEY! it's time,buddy - time for beddy-bye" and I says to my body I says - don't think so, just a couple of things left to do at my desk. Apparently one of those things was to drool all over myself since one of the guys from my shop found me in a small pool of it. My response? : "Just recharging the 'ol batteries, mate - don't you worry in the least" - at least that's what I probably tried to say - what came out was probably a lot more garbled and incoherent - but I got some other stuff done with the fresh charge and got cleaned up to finish the day. It's amazing what a shower and change of clothes can do for one's quality of life.

I've been blessed with 5 packages in the past 3 days - totally amazing it is. I've only opened one present so far - I rationalized it because I was running out of room in my office and needed to condense some stuff down and it felt like it was a sweatshirt or something which would be nice since it's like 50 degrees around this place in the mornings. But no sweatshirt was to be found in this package - NO-NO! as Wilbur would say. Inside I found a plastic ziploc bag - inside the bag was bubblewrap - inside the bubble wrap was what I know now to be perfection in a plastic wrapper - I had heard them mentioned in passing from my brother-in-law when he was deployed - I thought to myself - what's the big deal, how on Earth could a S'more not cooked over a fire taste any good? (my wonderfully excellent wife has spoiled me on more than one occasion with her S'more skills so I have a high standard) So I see them in the bag - ok, I know these are supposed to be good - seems like there's a lot of them in there - I bet the guys in my shop would like to have one - I give away 4 to the people I work closely with - and I think...I haven't had dinner yet...I'm kind of hungry...I really should check and make sure they taste ok since I already gave a couple away. So I take one out, pierce the little wrapper - smell it - smells like...S'more...ok this is promising - peel it back and take a bite.

Hold the phone.

No way - how did they do this - this isn't possible - I can't believe how good it tastes - amazing - I gave how many away?!?!? It's probably good I did give them to my guys before I tasted it - everybody should have the opportunity of tasting this thing at least once in his or her lifetime - even if somebody doesn't like S'mores they should get one and give it to me instead.

So that was nice - kept me going until the drooling incident mentioned above.

Also in the packages:

- Probably 10 pounds worth of magazines ranging from motorcycles to technology to hunting to financial investment to foreign policy - I like to diversify my reading like Warren Buffet's stocks

- Lots of yummy-looking treats and sweets that I am going to have to share with friends out here
- I kind of feel like a kid whose parents are trying to buy him friends by sending him to school with the best lunches with lots of candy to attract other boys and girls

- Lots of healthy food / bars that are totally excellent, especially on flights

- A power bill from an electric company from one of my parents' friends(already in the mail back to them, by the way) - like I said, I like to diversify my reading

- And probably the most ingenious thing I've received yet - an empty gallon-size double zip-loc bag. Sounds crazy but goes to show how parents are to me - you see it was accompanied with a gallon-size bag of Boy Scout popcorn - and to allow me to savor it and not rush to finish it off before it goes stale, they sent me a container to put whatever I don't finish in the first sitting - they're pretty smarsome (Smart / awesome - oh yeah, I'm at the point where I can make my own words)

Raise your hand if you've claimed your territory (in the strictly animalistic lift-your-leg-and-claim-some-space sense of the phrase) on three continents in as many months (And I'm not talking about using the louve or whatever the brits call the bathroom - I'm talking about getting back to your roots and becoming one with nature)...nobody? Oh wait - I'm typing with just one hand right now because the other is proudly held high - that's right...3 continents...3 months...claimed by me - and people thought England was an imperialist country - beat that Queen Liz.

For those wondering what's the deal with the chasm between updates - we turned into a submarine and went 20,000 leagues down to look for Atlantis - the truth is actually both more complicated and more simple than that - go figure.

By the way, that's me in the picture looking dapper in the most ridiculously awesome facial hair EVER - I know my dad will be proud.
The Man Cave OUT